Name change is definite. Legal name is bog-standard American Fem, was used abusively by the Ex, and is past hated and into triggering. SCA name, on the other hand, is Irish, already neutral-shading-male, and is what everyone has been calling him for a 15 years in all contexts (including mundane work) anyway.

Changing gender on legal documents, at least in Indiana, requires first jumping through a great many medical hoops for documentation. He hasn't decided if he's going to do that yet. If he so chooses down the line, then we'll take care of the paperwork then - but the name change needs to happen, and sooner rather than later.